the bully in us

the 'amalayer' video has been circulating on social networking sites facebook and twitter and on youtube for a couple of weeks now.out of curiosity, i watched it.it was a video taken by a certain guy of a lady berating a lady guard at the lrt station in manila.at first, you would definitely feel sorry for the lady guard and instantly annoyed by how the lady lambasted her in front of several fellow commuters.the guard appeared to be defenseless and vulnerable. after i watched it,i not only feel sorry for the lady guard but for the lady as well.although she acted on an unlikely manner in a public place while attracting lots of spectators to huddle around them, she also became a victim here. in a free democratic country, where we are free to express our opinion, posting such video may not be a big of a deal. the incident happened in a public setting but this doesn't mean that we are free to capture a video or photo of anybody and post in on the internet without the person's consent (i am sure the girl would have disapproved of it). the one who posted the video may have his valid and justifiable reasons by doing so but i deem it unfair and irresponsible. i wished he could have captured the whole scenario right from the start and not just a portion of it. in our society, most people are too quick to pass on judgment and lack initiative to examine closely as to how and why the lady reacted on that manner. it's difficult to comment on something when we are not personally there to witness it. a 3-minute video doesn't sum up the whole scene.it's too weak to be a basis for judgment.it was evident that the lady overreacted and the lady guard was totally embarrassed. as a matter of fact, both of them are victims here. people who watched the video and shared them to friends up until now are what i consider bullies. we may have different views about the video but i personally believe that we don't have the right to further humiliate the lady  involved.i am sure that none of us would want to be on her position especially on the aftermath of the incident where she was bombarded with nasty comments.most often when someone behaves inappropriately, we are too quick to judge. we lack empathy.we must learn to respect another person's privacy. we don't have the right to humiliate anybody and it should never be a liberty to do so.may the incident be a lesson to all of us. the next time you witness such, try to think twice before you record it. you may get millions of views on youtube instantly, but there will always be bitter repercussions in the end.

there's an old story about a captain of a ship that was sailing on a dark, pitch-black night.the captain suddenly noticed a bright light directly in front of him, and he knew that his ship was on collision course with the light. he rushed to the radio and sent an urgent message, demanding that the vessel to change its course ten degrees east. a few seconds later, he received a message in return. the message said, " cannot do it. change your course ten degrees west." the captain got angry. he sent another cryptic message, " i'm a navy captain. i demand you change your course." he received a message back a few seconds later. it said, "i'm a seaman second class. cannot do it. change your course. the captain was now furious. he sent one final message. it said, "i'm a battleship, and i'm not changing my course!" he got a curt message in return, it said, "i'm a lighthouse. it's your choice, sir."

sometimes when things go wrong, when people hurt or betray us, forgiveness doesn't come instantly. we tend to be stubborn just like the captain. we think of all the reasons why we're not going to change and why we aren't capable of forgiving them. we hold on to that anger deep inside. we cling to unforgiveness which only leads us to trouble. little do we know that we are heading to a destructive path in our life. forgiveness is a choice but it is not an option. it's up to us to change our course and move on.

story taken from Your Best Life Now by Joel Osteen